Tell Me a Story
Posted in Blog by: LottieI met the most interesting man a few days ago. He mesmorised me with his stories and I could have talked to him for days. He told me of how he survived the Second World War, saw the rise and fall of communism, back-packed across Europe in 1950, spent five years in a hospital bed in his twenties fighting tuberculoises, helped rebuild a nation, can speak four languages including Arabic and has had a wild romance of 55 years with his beautiful wife. (His words not mine).I learned more about this man I had just met in two hours than I know about many of my close friends.
It got me thinking and I can’t recall the last time I got to know someone face to face without any preconceptions, without asking what they do, without knowing their blog.
You see we talk and talk but very little is actually ever said. We live in this age of facebook, texts, twits and emails but it seems like we don’t really talk to each other anymore. There are so many ways of communicating that it’s making me dizzy. All these buzzes, bleeps and vibrations and the irony is that all this communication is just making what we say less meaningful. These things that are supposed to bring us together are really doing the opposite in many ways.
Billions of mobiles, emails accounts and social network profiles have perferated the division between our personal and private lives so that all there is a murky blur of what is and is not known. So many details of our lives are available at the click of a button that we forget to share our experiences in the most basic of ways, speech.
A friend of mine recently mentioned something about a previous relationship of which I knew nothing. He assumed that I knew all about it already. Wasn’t this information floating about out there in the e-ther? With all this easy-access-info, sometimes we just forget to ask.
So my friends, the next time I see you I don’t wnat to know how your day was- I can find that out on Twitter. I don’t need to know your plans for the week- I can find out on your blog. I don’t need to know what you did last night – the photos will probably be on Facebook soon.
I want you to tell me something I don’t know. Something that’s not connected to some world-wide portal. Something small, something huge, I don’t care. Just talk to me.
February 10th, 2009 at 4:00 pm
I object to you taking this post out of my head and writing it as your own.
You’ll be hearing from my legal people.
On the subject, I’m tired of writing, I want to talk.
February 10th, 2009 at 4:13 pm
[...] http://www.thenationallottie.com/?p=3015 [...]
February 10th, 2009 at 4:20 pm
You’re right, you know. Sometimes I’m so busy checking this and sending that, I don’t actually say anything for a whole day. Sometimes there’s so much going on, I wouldn’t know what to say…
February 10th, 2009 at 4:26 pm
You’ll regret asking people to talk to you, you know. Just be warned…
February 10th, 2009 at 4:48 pm
This year so far, despite the ups and downs, has been the absolute best of my life to date. I’m having a tremendous amount of fun. Yes, it’s all about me.
Oh, and here’s a question for you to ponder:
“How does it change many dyslexics to take a light-bulb?”
February 10th, 2009 at 4:59 pm
I would very much like to repost this blog on my own blog, as quoted text, with a link back to you of course. might I?
i am currently tryin to explain (unsuccesfully) to a friend that i dont want to know her daily doings each day, i want to know her feelings, thoughts, impressions of things and people – and she doesnt quite get it. i also am downsizing my ‘friends’ lists at FB and Myspace – if you havent spoken to me in a month or more, why are we ‘friends’?
great blog.
February 10th, 2009 at 5:17 pm
@Rick She is your legal advisor
K. Let me see. I have a bizarre penchant for the type of songs that urchins sing in old 1950’s Oirish movies?
Better?
February 10th, 2009 at 5:18 pm
On that note… Flight of the Doves anyone?
February 10th, 2009 at 5:18 pm
I can sing any given note without a reference point, if that makes any sense. Like, you can just go “sing a middle C”, and I can. I’m a bit freaky that way. Also, as of last Sunday, I can accurately pronounce “Excuse me, do you speak English?” in Mandarin. And yet, I can’t taste the difference between regular Coke and Diet Coke.
February 10th, 2009 at 6:31 pm
@Rick -I’m all ears.
@SP – You are on my list of people I must talk to. You’re going to Cork right?
@Darren – I know. I know. I just have to stay away from the boring people and all will be fine.
@Darragh – What does it say about me that I read that as if correct?
@Donna – Hi and thanks for the comment. Feel free to re-post – I do it enough. And I agree completeley – small talk is just pointless. Sure, get the “how was your days?” out of the way then move on.
@Ciara – God help him then.
Have you heard that new song? I think it’s called Australia? That kind of thing? And Flight of The Doves? Is that a movie?
@Gav – Oh Im so going to test that claim. Where did I leave my tuning fork?
February 10th, 2009 at 6:46 pm
Oh yes I do agree.
This is why I don’t have facebook or twitter or the like. If someone wants to talk to me, they call me, or email me in fairness but at least that’s more personal.
I blog anon because I don’t want it to be a medium for friends or anything, it’s just a hobby of mine – - everything I do put on my blog is something I have talked about with friends anyway..
At the same time, I have met some lovely people in blogland so it’s good for talking in that sense.
February 10th, 2009 at 6:49 pm
This post really hit a mark with me. I’m often really shy when it comes to asking people anything about their personal lives, but always always want to ask. I find that at social events, tweetups etc., I worry about asking intrusive questions despite the fact that there ARE some people that really fascinate me and I wish I knew *everything* about.
I’ve so many questions for so many of the people I’ve met over the last year, I think it’s time to start asking.
Thanks for posting this.
February 10th, 2009 at 7:39 pm
beautiful beautiful post… reminds me to make more of an effort to actually meet people instead of just emailing them…
February 10th, 2009 at 7:59 pm
Yeah its true and its crazy….
When did the internet start taking COMPLETE control over peoples lives? Mine included?
Like in 50 years will people be chewing around talking about ‘in my day we had a thing called TheFacebook….’
Harumph!
If i can’t think of anything to tell you il make something decent up
February 10th, 2009 at 8:25 pm
Woah!
What a fantastic post, I’ve only really got into the blogging scene fully in the last month, even though my blog has been going for nearly a year. But I have read some fantastic posts, found new people and thats been really enjoyable.
For me I love meeting and talking to new people, and reading and hearing their opinions on various topics. Blogging is a form of escapism just like reading, it allows me to unwind and express my views to the world.
Hmm…something about me, I have a soft spot for Lily Allen
February 10th, 2009 at 8:37 pm
@Voodoolady – I totally understand the desire to blog anonymously – I wish I had had the sense to do that. It would certainly have saved some hassel and opened up my blogging options. But that boat has most cettainly sailed.
@Sinead – I feel exactly the same. But saying that it’s hard to get to now someone properly in a big group. There’s too much going on. It’s those intiamte lunches and drinks and mid-bight chats that get you there.
@Tatty – Thank you dear. Well coming out anytime is a start.
@BEn -You? Make something up? Okay you can make something up but it has to based on truth.
@Ian – I hit the blogging social scene before I even had a blog so I really did it backwards. And funny you shoudlsay that about lily Allen, as I got your comment I had just pressed play on her new album. So far so good.
February 10th, 2009 at 9:50 pm
I’m not sure the anon will last sadly, some of my friends are starting up blogs now and I am forgetful. I outted myself to someone at one point a few months ago by emailing from my personal mail instead of screenname account. DER.
February 10th, 2009 at 11:43 pm
Lottie
A couple of years ago, I watched a documentary about Portrane Psychiatric Hospital. There is a woman there who had a breakdown well over 20 or 30 years ago and has been there ever since. She is non communicative. Her kind and gentle husband comes to see her every day.
When I doubt humanity, I think of them.
February 11th, 2009 at 9:30 am
Interesting post. And very true. The real stuff doesnt always come out Tweeting that you’re off to the hairdressers isn’t as interesting as how you forgave yourself for messing up your last relationship. It’s good to talk
But maybe blogs arent always the best means? Perhaps / Maybe?
February 11th, 2009 at 10:38 am
“I want you to tell me something I don’t know”
I can pop my bellybutton inside out. Loverly post by the way!
February 11th, 2009 at 11:04 am
Food for thought! Can’t help wondering how you ended up chatting with this remarkable gentleman.
February 11th, 2009 at 12:15 pm
Voodoolady – These things have a way of getting out eventually. You did well to last as long as you did.
@Holemaster – Jeeze would he not put her out of her misery?
(I’m lovely really! )
@Charmed – Blogs are a good way to get the ball rolling. IN writing you realise things about yourself that you would never bring up or admit in a conversation. Or maybe that’s just me.
@KC – Weird. YOU TUBE IT NOW! go on! I have no special bodily talents. I can roll my tongue. That’s about it.
@Conor – Met him when I was down the Country for th weekend – he’s a father of a family friend. He really was remarkable. Going on 80 and he has more life in them than any of the 20’s I know. He had dozens of little stories from his trips and observations of people around the world. I pestered him to start writing these things down and maybe look at publishing them so who knows.
February 11th, 2009 at 2:15 pm
Oooh, hope you enjoy the album
Let me know if its any good
February 11th, 2009 at 2:59 pm
I can touch my nose with my tongue. In fact I can very easily touch my nose with my tongue. If I tried hard enough I could probably touch my ear.
Great post Lottie. Best I’ve read in quite a while. If I had a hat I’d take it off and nod in your direction.
February 11th, 2009 at 3:11 pm
@Ian – It’s very listenableto. It could be a word. In some parallel universe. I listened to it about three times on repeat last night while I cleaned my house.
@NaRocRoc – :*). Stop that. You’re making me blush!
February 11th, 2009 at 3:13 pm
Sounds good then
February 11th, 2009 at 3:28 pm
Is it my tongue talk that makes you blush Lottie?!?
February 11th, 2009 at 3:34 pm
No chance missus! If you manage to find me at the Rocky Horror night on Saturday and I’m drunk enough I might show you!
February 11th, 2009 at 3:35 pm
No, no, no!!!
You all have it wrong! Stop telling Lottie things that look like they belong in tweets.
She wants you to chat extensively to her in person or on the phone.
So either grab her for an hour of you see her or mail me for her number
February 11th, 2009 at 3:44 pm
Every little helps Rick!
February 11th, 2009 at 6:03 pm
I remember….
The days before world-wide portals! The TV had Radio Telifis Eireann and that was on from about 6pm and shut down before midnight!
We had to talk to each other there was nothing else to do!
February 11th, 2009 at 6:30 pm
@Rick – Stop spoiling my fun!
@KC -Alas the ATM says “No” and I gotta skip Staurday night. It will be a night in with wine and candel-light me thinks – Not all that bad though.
@NaRoc – I blush easily.
@Grannymar – I want to want to talk not have to talk. I am going to make an effort to see people rather than email or text them. I had my first guinne pig experiment today when I just showed up on someones door step looking for coffee and a chat. That tact is probably not apprecated much but it’s a start.
February 11th, 2009 at 7:00 pm
Total eye opener.It has just downed on me how true this is. I see my ‘BEST FRIEND’ once a week if that and all we ever do is make small talk becuase we feel like we have already shared our week on facebook and by little one liner emails.
I feel a bit sad now and realise that I dont have a friendship anymore but an internet acquaintance. Its almost akin to reading about celebrities in magazines. I will go call her this instant and make a plan for a proper sit down.
February 11th, 2009 at 7:11 pm
Talking face to face is easy, all you need are people
February 11th, 2009 at 8:23 pm
I just dropped a chop on the floor and put it back on my bother’s plate.
February 11th, 2009 at 8:27 pm
@Holemaster – That actually says quite a lot about you.
February 11th, 2009 at 10:14 pm
I shall tell you nothing here, but I will try to think up something worthwhile to tell you in person. The lovely Jen of Sinéad and Jen took my arm on Saturday when we were out rousing the rabble and asked me loads of questions about me and what I do and what my favourite things were. I felt rather special to be honest. She’s firmly planted on my good side. Huge thumbs up to proper conversations about people.
February 11th, 2009 at 10:20 pm
Yeah, it says I can’t spell Brother.
February 11th, 2009 at 10:24 pm
@Sinead – Oh and now I have leverage on you so you had better make it something good!
@Holemaster – Right – well I refer to my little sister as bother so I didn’t think anything of that.
February 12th, 2009 at 6:20 am
That kind of things makes me want to impose an Internet ban on myself. It’s sad to think that relationships are being cultivated online these days when it’s so much better to see friends make an effort in the real world.
February 12th, 2009 at 6:21 am
That kind of thing makes me want to impose an Internet ban on myself. It’s sad to think that relationships are being cultivated online these days when it’s so much better to see friends make an effort in the real world.
February 12th, 2009 at 9:43 am
The chat was muchappreciated!
Next time though, not so much of tempting transfat-ridden sugary carbohydratesthough
February 12th, 2009 at 10:42 am
Found your blog via Holemaster. Didn’t expect to find such good writing. Don’t think I agree with you though. People talk to me too much. I’m far more comfortable with small talk. Weather, football and films. That’s about it for me.
February 12th, 2009 at 1:39 pm
Talking is over rated if you ask me! People only end up disappointing you.
February 12th, 2009 at 1:48 pm
I disagree Andretti. Before I started blogging I had perhaps two real genuine close friends and was of an age where it’s hard to make new ones.
Since then I’ve gained another 3 or 4 and a host of other good mates, all of whom are now real world friendships and I think that’s only going to keep growing.
February 12th, 2009 at 2:03 pm
@Andretti – The majority of the firendships I have at the moment hae resulted from a relationship that began online so I can’t say anything against that. I think you get to a certian age and it’s definitley harder to make friends, the Internet disposes of those first few akward meetings and introduces you to people whom you normally wouldn’t meet or associate with otherwise. Often by the time you meet you know all about their life, family work etc. and that’s where I think the problem is – you think ou already know all there is to know.
@Simon – Thank you. Who said no good could come from Holemasters Blog?
@Stew – Ah bah humbug to you too. Grumpy!
@SOP – What you said!
February 12th, 2009 at 3:30 pm
Im only getting into this blogging malarkey and dont even have broadband at home so I have yet to get sucked in. I send a lot though of texts becuase I am too lazy or cheap to call and have a proper conversation.
February 12th, 2009 at 5:27 pm
I suppose that the comment I imparted was a bit off topic and I generalised a bit. I also found myself contradicting my own words, having met numerous people through the Internet myself and making good friends out of it.
March 7th, 2009 at 9:34 pm
Loverly post!
Something random about me….I love fried liver. mmmmmmmm